Kill me, honey, and do it fast!

Please, don’t ask about this poem’s meaning,
it would simply ruin everything.
Just, leave it.

If there’s no way to get through
what is the point in being with you?

You hold your shield so close to heart,
I cant’t find a trick to cross that distance,
to make myself an important part,
all I get is your tough resistance...

Maybe I look and dress like I’m strong,
but some things I really can’t fight with,
whatever I do, I think it’s wrong,
’cause it’s ruled simply by my heartbeat.

I can’t control this situation,
that makes me feel so weak and small,
I can only use my imagination,
that’s the place where I could have it all.

Don’t try to understand me,
it’s sometimes hard even to me,
try to be silly, childish and free,
that’s the blessing, you will see.

Keep yourself somewhere around me,
I hope that’s not too much to ask for,
I like the sound and shine of your smiling,
from this life I couldn’t deserve more.

If I’m not so privileged to have you beside me,
as long as this dream could last,
can you do me a final favour-
Kill me, honey, and do it fast!

To B.

24.07.2008.